Christmas is approaching, and with it comes the season of giving. But have you ever found yourself buying a gift for someone you're still upset with? You scroll through Amazon thinking, "What says I love you but I'm not over it yet?" This scenario reveals a deeper truth about generosity - you can do the right thing with the wrong heart.

True generosity isn't about the amount you give or even the act itself. It's about the heart behind the giving. Many of us approach generosity with mixed feelings - we give, but not always with joy. We share, but secretly worry we won't have enough left. We might even tithe 10% of our income, but treat it more like a tax than an act of worship.

The truth is simple: a thankful heart is a generous heart. Generosity isn't about money - it's about mission. It's not about guilt - it's about gratitude. And it's not about how much you give, but why you give.

The Problem Isn't Resources
Many of us believe that generosity is simply a matter of money. We tell ourselves, "If I just had more, I'd give more" or "If I could get ahead, I'd start tithing." But money doesn't change generosity - it reveals it.

We don't struggle because of a lack of resources. Living in America, we are part of the wealthiest 3% of the world's population. We struggle because we hold on too tightly out of fear, pride, or the desire for control.

The Grip of Fear
Some grip money because they're afraid of the unknown. Others hold tightly because money feels like security. Some people cling to control because money gives them a sense of power over their circumstances. But when you live with a closed fist, you miss out on what God is trying to do in you.

The open hand of faith always receives more than the closed fist of control. When we try to carry water with a clenched fist, the tighter we squeeze, the less we hold onto.

For some, the "barn" might be a 401k or savings account. For a dad, it might be control - wanting to secure every outcome for his family. For a mom, it might be comparison - feeling like what she gives never measures up. For others, it's self-protection - holding back time, love, and generosity until life feels more stable.

The Danger of "I" and "My"
The rich man's plan sounded smart: tear down old barns and build bigger ones. It was good business sense. But in just two verses, he used "I" and "my" over six times - my crops, my barns, my grain, my goods, my soul. His world expanded, but his heart shrank. His life got bigger but became emptier.

Buildings vs. Tables
There's a story of a wealthy businessman who, on his deathbed, said, "If I could do it all over again, I would build fewer buildings and bigger tables." Success is building something that outlives you; foolishness is building something that dies when you do.

The difference isn't in the building itself, but in what you're building it for. When you realize your barns can't follow you into eternity, your heart starts longing to build something that will.

Life is on Loan
God reminded the rich man—and reminds us—that life isn't owned, it's on loan. Everything we hold is temporary. Every barn, every plan, every dream belongs to God. Sometimes God pauses what we're trying to build because He wants to finish what He's building in us.

Before God lays concrete, He lays character. Before He gives us what's next, He shapes us for who we're becoming.

What God Really Wants
God has all the resources. He doesn't need yours - He wants you. The rich man thought his barns were a blessing, but God was after something deeper. When we live open-handed, we find what can never be taken away: peace, purpose, and joy.

Being Rich Toward God
To be rich toward God means living with open hands - hands ready to receive freely and release generously, hands that confidently know the Lord provides. In the kingdom of God, wealth isn't what you hold; it's who you help.

When you die, God won't ask how many barns you built. He'll ask what you filled them with. Were your barns full of grain or God's grace? Were they filled with stuff or with God's story working through you?

This week, consider what changes are necessary to live with open hands. Review your finances, time, and focus. Rather than stressing over results, rely on God through obedience.

You might not be able to give what someone else can, but you can give what's in your heart. When you live open-handed, something shifts. Giving stops feeling like a loss and starts feeling like life again.

Generosity isn't about getting something back - it's about realizing how much you've already been given. Christ gave His entire life for you. When that spirit permeates your life and community, transformation occurs.

Questions for Reflection:

• What "barns" am I building that might be blinding me to God's purposes?
• Where am I gripping too tightly out of fear, pride, or desire for control?
• How can I shift from asking "What's mine?" to "God, what do you want me to do with this?"
• What would change in my life if I truly believed that God's provision is more reliable than my planning?

Remember, this isn't about God getting your money - it's about God freeing your heart. Generosity isn't measured by what you give away, but by the grip that money has on your heart.